so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
