just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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