Whatcha textin bout Willis?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
