Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
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