Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Pooping to opera.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
