i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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