Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
