I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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