Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
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