I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Randomize