is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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