All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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