Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
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