no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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