She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Vodka?
Forever.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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