Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I think im going to throw up on grandma
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize