i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
