everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
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