I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize
