Don't you send me to vm
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize
