why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
