sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
