Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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