:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize