How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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