Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
