Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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