There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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