The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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