He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Randomize
