You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
