Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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