I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
