We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize