Define "chronic" masturbator.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Panties = found
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
