Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
