Having a random hookup so left but love u
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
