Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
