Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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