i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
