Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize