Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
