no, he came in my armpit
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
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