My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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