I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
