I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
people are starting to question the shark bite story
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
