Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Randomize
