Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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