A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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