I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize