What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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